Exposed

Sometimes I feel heavy. (No, not fat.) But heavy and burdened. And then that heaviness increases. I am cool as a cucumber to the human eye, but inside, I am screaming and suffocating. Then I reach my breaking point. It's been a learning experience this last week. God was breaking me down; ripping off the layers of this crazy facade that I had let cover me. Satan was hissing in my ear those same old lies. He knew just the right things to say to make this breaking point even worse. I could feel my heart hardening, but I held true to what I needed to do. I exposed myself to those I love the most. It was hard. It was scary. It was the first step that I needed to take. The outpouring of love pierced my heart. They were understanding. They loved me. They counselled; I listened. This is just the beginning to a beautiful beginning. One step at a time. But this time, I am not alone.